‘I think death is the ultimate form of freedom’

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Which song do you want to play at your own goodbye anyway?

“Spread Your Wings by Queen.”

Why this particular number?

“This song has been very close to me from an early age. I think I was aboutseven years old when I hit it hard. I come from a reformed liberatedenvironment, in which this kind of modern music was not really appreciated.One day I walked into my neighbor’s house and he put a pair of headphones onmy head, “Here, listen up, I’m sure you’ll like this.” That was a Queen album,I loved it and whenever I could, I’ve been looking for more of Queen and otherrock music.

For a long time I couldn’t pinpoint what it was about this song, why ittouches me the most. I now know: it is the feeling of freedom. Freddie Mercurysings ‘spread your wings and pick yourself up when the going gets tough’. Ifeel that too. Ironically, this song came out in my birth year. I think deathis the ultimate form of freedom, which is why this song fits me so well.”

And what does it say about your life?

“That freedom is the highest good. I grew up in Friesland and left there as aseventeen-year-old with the idea that there should be more to life. I had asteady job, prestige and responsibilities and I gave it all up to pursue mydream. Becoming a writer. With the little savings I had, I wrote my debutnovel. Fortunately, there was a publisher who saw the potential. I can nowpublish my fourth novel and this is the book it has to go to do.

The way I write is all-encompassing. Full-time drives and that for a year. I’mnot one of those people who can write for three hours and then have a job witha boss on the side. I need freedom. The rules and laws imposed in a job makeme feel very unsafe. Now it remains to be seen whether I can really make aliving as a writer.

My previous books did well and with some clever tricks I just made it. I had avery extensive record collection and occasionally sold some unique copies inorder to keep writing. Of those 200 euros I could still pay for somegroceries. Well with the deal that if my work takes off later, I can buy thatLP back from them.”

Where do you prefer to listen to music?

“At my desk. When I’m writing, I also use music to get into the right flow_to come. If I write a scene in a certain zeitgeist, I adjust the musicaccordingly. For example, my last book is set in a juvenile psychiatric clinicin the 1990s, so I listened to a lot while writing _Gaia from Valencia. Acracker of a hit from that time and completely fitting for the melancholyatmosphere in the story. Music is very important to me. Not only for my deathbut also for my life.”

How many lists do you have on Spotify?

“About fifteen anyway. Those are lists of classical music, especially Chopin,but also very hard metal. Also great when you’re in a traffic jam and someonein front of you isn’t paying attention. Sometimes I’ll drive next to it justfor fun, then, with my window down and Machine Head blaring out of thespeakers, so they know who they’re dealing with. Or when I have a deadline tomeet, that works so well. I also choose a certain music for each character inmy book to bring that person to life. The choice for melancholic music, orclassical, therefore has an effect and even determines my choice of words atthat moment.”

What is your guilty pleasure?

“Hey, I don’t have that at all. Is that boring? No, right? I just come outpontifically for everything I like.”